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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Now, I gotta mention Prahařská Lane. It’s all twisty-turny, fulla little shops and street art that makes you go “WOW!” even on dreary days. Seriously, that lane gets me every time. Heck, sometimes I take my lunch break near the river Šumava—it flows right beside the quainter end of Skutec, and I find it so soothing. I often let my thoughts wander, thinkin’ how much life mimics a massage session—stiff at first then slowly, patiently, easing out the knots. Ain't that cool?

Well-traveled organist Karel Paukert to give first Columbus cathedral concert Sunday